by H G Wells

He sits not dozen yards away If I glance over my shoulder him And if I catch his eye--and usually I catch his eye--it meets me with an expression----

mainly an imploring look--and yet with suspicion

Confound his suspicion ! If on him told I don't tell and I don't tell, and he ought at his ease anything so gross and fat as feel at ease ! believe me if tell ?

Poor old Pyecraft ! Great, uneasy jelly of substance ! The fattest clubman in London

He sits at little club tables huge bay fire, stuffing he stuffing ? I glance judiciously, and catch him biting at round of hot buttered teacake, eyes on me Confound him ! -- eyes on me !

That settles it, Pyecraft ! Since abject, since you _will behave not man of honour, here, right under your embedded eyes, I write the thing down--the plain truth about Pyecraft The man I helped, the man I shielded, and who has requited me by making my club unendurable, absolutely unendurable, liquid appeal, perpetual "don't tell" looks

And, besides, why does he keep on eternally eating ?

Well, here goes truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth !

Pyecraft---- the acquaintance of Pyecraft very smoking-room young, nervous new member, and it sitting all alone, wishing more members, and suddenly , great rolling front of chins and abdomina, towards me, and grunted and sat down in chair close by me and wheezed for space, and scraped for space with match and lit cigar, and then addressed me I forget what --something matches not lighting properly, and afterwards as he talked he kept stopping the waiters one by one went by, and telling them matches thin, fluty voice he has But, anyhow, in some such way we began our talking

He talked about various things and came round to games And thence to my figure and complexion "_You good cricketer," I suppose slender, slender to what some people would call lean, and I suppose rather dark, still---- not ashamed of having Hindu great-grandmother, but, for all that, I don't want casual strangers through me at glance to her set against Pyecraft beginning

But he only talked about me to himself

"I expect," , "you take no more exercise than , and probably you eat no less " (Like all excessively obese people he fancied he ate nothing ) "Yet"--and he smiled an oblique smile--"we differ "

And then he began about his fatness fatness; all fatness and all going fatness; what people had advised him fatness and what he had heard of people doing for fatness similar "_A priori_," , "one would think question of nutrition answered by dietary and question of assimilation by drugs " stifling dumpling talk It made me feel swelled to hear him

One stands that sort of thing once in way at club, but time came when I fancied standing altogether too conspicuously never go smoking-room but come wallowing towards me, and sometimes and gormandised round and about me while I had my lunch at times almost clinging bore, but not so fearful bore be limited and first something manner--almost , almost he penetrated fact that I might_--that remote, exceptional chance in me that no one else presented

"I'd give anything it down," say--"anything," and peer at me over his vast cheeks and pant Poor old Pyecraft ! He has just gonged; to order another buttered teacake !

actual thing one day "Our Pharmacopoeia," , "our Western Pharmacopoeia, is anything but the last word of medical science East, I've been told----"

He stopped and stared at me like being at an aquarium

quite suddenly angry "Look here," , "who told you great-grandmother's recipes ? "

"Well," he fenced

"Every time we've met for week," --"and we've met pretty often-- you've given me broad hint or so little secret "

"Well," , "now the cat's bag, I'll admit, yes, so I had it----"

"From Pattison ? "

"Indirectly," , which I believe was lying, "yes "

"Pattison," , "took that stuff at his own risk " He pursed his mouth and bowed

"My great-grandmother's recipes," , "are queer things to handle My father was near making me promise----"

"He didn't ? "

"No But he warned me He himself used one--once "

"Ah ! . But ---- ? Suppose--suppose there did happen one----"

"The things are curious documents," "Even the smell of 'em . No ! "

But after going Pyecraft was resolved go farther always little afraid if I tried his patience fall on me suddenly and smother me I own weak But also annoyed with Pyecraft I had got state of feeling for him that disposed me , "Well, risk ! " The little affair of Pattison alluded was different matter altogether What doesn't concern us now, but , anyhow, particular recipe I used then was safe The rest I didn't know about, and, whole, inclined to doubt their safety pretty completely

Yet even if Pyecraft got poisoned----

confess the poisoning of Pyecraft struck me as an immense undertaking

That evening that queer, odd-scented sandal-wood box out safe, and turned the rustling skins over The gentleman who wrote the recipes great-grandmother evidently had weakness for skins of miscellaneous origin, handwriting was cramped last degree things are quite unreadable --though my family, with its Indian Civil Service associations, has kept up knowledge of Hindustani from generation to generation--and none are absolutely plain sailing But the one that was there soon enough, and sat floor by my safe for looking at it

"Look here," said I to Pyecraft , and snatched the slip away eager grasp

" as make it out, recipe for Loss of Weight ("Ah ! " said Pyecraft ) I'm not absolutely sure, but it's that And take my advice you'll leave it alone Because, --I blacken my blood in your interest, Pyecraft--my ancestors side were, as gather, jolly queer lot See ? "

"Let me try it," said Pyecraft

I leant back in my chair My imagination made one mighty effort and fell flat within me "What in Heaven's name, Pyecraft," I asked, " you'll look like get thin ? "

impervious to reason, him promise never word about his disgusting fatness again whatever happened--never, and then I handed him that little piece of skin

"It's nasty stuff,"

"No matter," , and took it

He goggled at it "But--but--"

He had just discovered wasn't English

" best ability," , " translation "

my best we didn't speak for fortnight Whenever he approached me I frowned and motioned him away, and he respected our compact, but end fortnight as fat as ever And then he got word in