"Where's the recipe ? "

He produced it gingerly pocket-book

I ran my eye over the items " egg addled ? " I asked

"No Ought it ? "

"That," , "goes without saying in all my poor dear great-grandmother's recipes When condition or quality specified get the worst She was drastic or nothing . And there's possible alternatives to other things You got fresh_ rattlesnake venom ? "

"I got rattlesnake from Jamrach's It cost--it cost----"

"That's your affair anyhow This last item----"

" man who----"

"Yes H'm Well, I'll write the alternatives down as the language, the spelling recipe is particularly atrocious By-the-by, dog here probably means pariah dog "

For month Pyecraft constantly club and as fat and anxious as ever He kept our treaty, but at times he broke the spirit of it by shaking his head despondently Then one day cloakroom , "Your great-grandmother----"

"Not word against her," ; and he held his peace

fancied he had desisted, and him one day talking to three new members about his fatness in search of other recipes And then, quite unexpectedly, his telegram came

" Mr Formalyn ! " bawled page-boy under my nose, and the telegram and opened it at once

"_For Heaven's sake come --_Pyecraft "

"H'm," said I, and the truth so pleased rehabilitation great-grandmother's reputation this evidently promised that most excellent lunch

I got Pyecraft's address hall porter Pyecraft inhabited the upper half of house in Bloomsbury, and I went there so soon as I had done my coffee and Trappistine wait to finish my cigar

" Mr Pyecraft ? " said I, front door

They believed ill; he hadn't been out for two days

"He expects me," said I, sent me up

I rang the bell lattice-door landing

"He shouldn't have tried it, anyhow," to myself "A man who eats like pig ought to look like pig "

An obviously worthy woman, with an anxious face and carelessly placed cap, came and surveyed me lattice

my name and she let me in in dubious fashion

"Well ? " said I, stood together inside Pyecraft's piece landing

"'E said you was in came," she said, and regarded me, making no motion to show me anywhere And then, confidentially, "'E's locked in, sir "

"Locked in ? "

"Locked 'imself in yesterday morning and 'asn't let in since, sir And ever and again swearing Oh, my ! "

I stared door she indicated by her glances "In there ? "

"Yes, sir "

"What's up ? "

She shook her head sadly "'E keeps on calling for vittles, sir '_Eavy vittles 'e wants I get 'im what Pork 'e's had, sooit puddin', sossiges, noo bread Everythink like that Left outside, please, and me go away 'E's eatin', sir, somethink awful "

There came piping bawl from inside the door: "That Formalyn ? "

"That you, Pyecraft ? " I shouted, and went and banged the door

"Tell her away "

Then hear curious pattering door, almost like some one feeling handle dark, and Pyecraft's familiar grunts

"It's all right," , "she's gone "

But the door didn't open

I heard the key turn Then Pyecraft's voice said, "Come in "

I turned the handle and opened the door Naturally I expected Pyecraft

Well, , he wasn't there !

I never had such shock in my life his sitting-room in state of untidy disorder, plates and dishes books and writing things, and several chairs overturned, but Pyecraft----

"It's all right, old man; shut the door," , and then I discovered him

There , right up close cornice corner door, some one had glued him ceiling His face was anxious and angry He panted and gesticulated "Shut the door," " woman gets hold of it----"

I shut the door, and went and stood away and stared

"If anything gives way and you tumble down," , "you'll break your neck, Pyecraft "

" ," he wheezed

"A man of your age and weight getting kiddish gymnastics----"

"Don't," , and looked agonised

"I'll tell you," , and gesticulated

"How the deuce," said I, " holding on up there ? "

And then abruptly I realised that not holding on at all, that floating up there--just as gas-filled bladder floated same position He began struggle to thrust himself away ceiling and to clamber down the wall "It's that prescription," he panted, as so "Your great-gran----"

hold of framed engraving rather carelessly as he spoke and it gave way, and he flew back ceiling again, while the picture smashed on sofa Bump he went against the ceiling, and then why all over white more salient curves and angles person He tried again more carefully, coming down by way mantel

really most extraordinary spectacle, that great, fat, apoplectic-looking man upside down and trying ceiling floor "That prescription," "Too successful "

"How ? "

"Loss of weight--almost complete "

And then, , I understood

"By Jove, Pyecraft," said I, "what was cure for fatness ! But you always called it weight call it weight "

Somehow extremely delighted I quite liked Pyecraft "Let me ! " , and took his hand and pulled him down He kicked about, trying foothold somewhere very like holding flag on windy day

"That table," , pointing, "is solid mahogany and very heavy put me under that----"

, and there he wallowed about like captive balloon, while I stood hearthrug and talked to him

I lit cigar "Tell me," , "what happened ? "

" it,"

"How did it taste ? "

"Oh, beastly ! "

fancy they all did Whether one regards the ingredients or the probable compound or the possible results, almost all my great-grandmother's remedies appear extraordinarily uninviting own part----

" little sip first "

"Yes ? "

"And as lighter and better after an hour, I decided to draught "

"My dear Pyecraft ! "

"I held my nose," he explained "And then I kept on getting lighter and lighter--and helpless, "

way suddenly to burst of passion "What the goodness am I to _do ? "

"There's pretty evident," , "that you mustn't do go out of doors you'll go up and up " I waved an arm upward "They'd have to send Santos-Dumont after you to bring you down again "

"I suppose wear off ? "

I shook my head "I don't think count ,"

And then another burst of passion, and he kicked out at adjacent chairs and banged the floor He behaved just as expected great, fat, self-indulgent man to behave under trying circumstances-- , very badly He spoke of me and great-grandmother with an utter want of discretion

"I never asked you to stuff,"

And generously disregarding the insults putting upon me, I sat down armchair and began to him in sober, friendly fashion

I pointed out to him was trouble he had brought upon himself, it had almost an air of poetical justice He had eaten This he disputed, and for time we argued the point

He became noisy and violent, so I desisted aspect lesson "And then," said I, "you committed the sin of euphuism You called it, not Fat, just and inglorious, but Weight You----"

He interrupted that he recognised all that he to _do ?