So the new convert to joie de vivre emerged passage, his decorations little scattered, but that respectable hatful of fungi still under his arm He hesitated three ways, and decided kitchen Whereupon Clarence, who was fumbling key, gave up the attempt to imprison his host, and fled scullery, only captured before open the door yard Mr Clarence is singularly reticent details of what occurred It seems that Mr Coombes' transitory irritation had vanished again, and once more genial playfellow And as there were knives and meat choppers about, Clarence very generously resolved to humour him and so avoid anything tragic beyond dispute that Mr Coombes played with Mr Clarence heart's content; more playful and familiar had known for years He insisted gaily on Clarence trying the fungi, and, after friendly tussle, was smitten with remorse mess making guest's face It also appears that Clarence was dragged under the sink face scrubbed blacking brush--he being still resolved to humour the lunatic at any cost-- finally, in somewhat dishevelled, chipped, and discoloured condition, assisted coat and shown out back door, the shopway being barred by Jennie Mr Coombes' wandering thoughts then turned to Jennie Jennie unable to unfasten the shop door, but she shot the bolts against Mr Coombes' latch-key, and remained in possession shop rest evening

It would appear that Mr Coombes then returned kitchen, still in pursuit of gaiety, and, albeit strict Good Templar, drank (or spilt down the front first and only frock-coat) no five bottles stout Mrs Coombes insisted upon having for her health's sake cheerful noises by breaking off the necks bottles with several wife's wedding-present dinner-plates, and during the earlier part great drunk he sang divers merry ballads He cut his finger rather badly with bottles--the only bloodshed story--and what , systematic convulsion inexperienced physiology liquorish brand of Mrs Coombes' stout, it the evil fungus poison was somehow allayed But we prefer to draw veil over the concluding incidents Sunday afternoon They ended coal cellar, in deep and healing sleep

An interval of five years elapsed Again Sunday afternoon in October, and again Mr Coombes walked pine wood beyond the canal still the same dark-eyed, black-moustached little man that outset story, but his double chin was now scarcely so illusory as it His overcoat was new, with velvet lapel, and stylish collar with turn-down corners, free of any coarse starchiness, had replaced the original all-round article His hat was glossy, his gloves newish--though one finger had split and been carefully mended And casual observer noticed about him certain rectitude of bearing, certain erectness of head that marks the man who thinks well of himself master now, with three assistants Beside him walked larger sunburnt parody of himself, his brother Tom, just back from Australia They were recapitulating their early struggles, and Mr Coombes had just been making financial statement

"It's very nice little business, Jim," said brother Tom " days of competition you're jolly lucky worked it up so And you're jolly lucky, too, wife who's willing to help like yours does "

"Between ourselves," said Mr Coombes, "it wasn't always so It wasn't always like this with, the missus was bit giddy Girls are funny creatures "

"Dear me ! "

"Yes You'd hardly think it, but she was downright extravagant, and always having slaps at me bit too easy and loving, and all that, and she thought the whole blessed show was run for her Turned the 'ouse into regular caravansery, always having her relations and girls from business in, and their chaps Comic songs a' Sunday, getting to, and driving trade away And she was making eyes chaps, too ! I tell you, Tom, the place wasn't my own "

"Shouldn't 'a' thought it "

" so Well--I reasoned with her , 'I ain't duke, wife like pet animal I married you for 'elp and company ' , 'You got to 'elp and pull the business through ' She wouldn't 'ear of it ' ,' I says ? ? 'I'm mild man till I'm roused,' I says, 'and it's getting ' But she wouldn't 'ear of no warnings "

"Well ? "

"It's the way with women She didn't think I 'ad it in me roused Women of her sort (between ourselves, Tom) don't respect man until they're bit afraid of him So I just broke out to show her In comes girl named Jennie, that used to work with her, and her chap We 'ad bit of row, and out 'ere-- just such another day --and it all out Then I went back and pitched into them "

" ? "

" mad, tell you I wasn't going to 'it 'er if 'elp it, so I went back and licked chap, just to show 'er what do 'E was big chap, too Well, I chucked him, and smashed things about, and gave 'er scaring, and she ran up and locked 'erself spare room "

"Well ? "

"That's all I says to 'er the next morning, 'Now ,' I says, 'what I'm like when I'm roused ' And I didn't have anything more "

"And you've been happy ever after, eh ? "

"So There's nothing like putting your foot down 'adn't been afternoon 'a' been tramping the roads now, and she'd 'a' been grumbling at me, and all her family grumbling for bringing her to poverty-- their little ways But we're all right now And it's very decent little business, say "

They proceeded on their way meditatively "Women are funny creatures," said Brother Tom

" firm hand," says Coombes

"What lot funguses about here ! " remarked Brother Tom presently " 't see what use "

Mr Coombes looked "I dessay they're sent for some wise purpose," said Mr Coombes

was thanks purple pileus ever got for maddening this absurd little man pitch of decisive action, and so altering the whole course life