by Mark Twain

When that I never knew my austere father enamoured of but one poem in all the long half century that he lived, persons who knew him will easily believe me; when that never composed but one poem in all the long third of century that lived, persons me sincerely grateful; and finally, when poem which I composed was not the one which my father was enamoured of, persons who known us both will not need this truth shot into them with mountain howitzer can receive it My father and I were always most distant terms when boy--a sort of armed neutrality so At irregular intervals this neutrality was broken, and suffering ensued; but candid enough breaking suffering were always divided up with strict impartiality -- , my father did the breaking, and the suffering As general thing backward, cautious, unadventurous boy; but I once jumped off two-story table; another time an elephant "plug" of tobacco and retired without waiting for an answer; and still another time I pretended talking in my sleep, and got off portion of very wretched original conundrum hearing father not pry result; of no consequence to but me

But the poem referred to as attracting my father's attention and achieving his favour was "Hiawatha " Some man who courted sudden and awful death presented him an early copy, and I never lost faith in my own senses until him sit down and go to reading it in cold blood--saw him open the book, and heard him read these following lines, same inflectionless judicial frigidity he always read his charge jury, or administered an oath to witness:

"Take your bow, O Hiawatha, Take your arrows, jasper-headed, Take your war-club, Puggawaugun, And your mittens, Minjekahwan, And your birch canoe for sailing, oil of Mishe-Nama "

Presently my father took out breast pocket an imposing "Warranty Deed," and fixed his eyes upon it and dropped into meditation what Texan lady and gentleman had given my half-brother, Orrin Johnson, handsome property in town North, in gratitude to him for having saved their lives by an act of brilliant heroism

By and by my father looked towards me and sighed Then :

"If I had such son poet, here were subject worthier traditions Indians "

" please, sir, where ? "

" deed "

"Yes-- very deed," said my father, throwing it table " more poetry, more romance, more sublimity, more splendid imagery hidden away homely document than found in all the traditions of all the savages that live "

"Indeed, sir ? Could I--could I get it out, sir ? Could I compose the poem, sir, ? "

"You ? "

I wilted

Presently my father's face softened somewhat, and :

"Go and try But mind, curb folly No poetry expense of truth Keep strictly facts "

, and bowed myself out, and went upstairs

"Hiawatha" kept droning in my head--and so did my father's remarks sublimity and romance hidden in my subject, and also his injunction to beware of wasteful and exuberant fancy I noticed, just here, that I had heedlessly brought the deed away with me; now moment came one rare moods of daring recklessness, such as I referred to while ago Without another thought, and in plain defiance fact that my father meant me to write the romantic story half-brother's adventure and subsequent good fortune, I ventured to heed merely the letter remarks and ignore their spirit the stupid "Warranty Deed" itself and chopped it up into Hiawathian blank verse without altering or leaving out three words, and without transposing six It required loads of courage downstairs and face my father with my performance I started three or four times before I finally got my pluck to where it would stick But at last go down and read it to him if he threw me over the church I stood up , and me closer I edged up little, but still left neutral ground as stand Then I began It useless what conflicting emotions expressed themselves upon his face, nor how they grew more and more intense, as I proceeded; nor how fell darkness descended upon his countenance, and he began to gag and swallow, hands began to work and twitch, as I reeled off line after line, strength ebbing out of me, and my legs trembling under me:

THE STORY OF GALLANT DEED

THIS INDENTURE, made the tenth Day of November, year Lord one thousand eight Hundred six-and-fifty,

Between Joanna S E Gray And Philip Gray, her husband, Of Salem City State Of Texas, first part,

And O B Johnson, town Of Austin, ditto, WITNESSETH: That said party of first part, For and in consideration

sum of Twenty Thousand Dollars, lawful money U S of Americay, in hand now paid by said

Party second part, The due receipt whereof is here-- By confessed and acknowledg-ed Having Granted, Bargained, Sold, Remised,

Released and Aliened and Conveyed, Confirmed, and presents do Grant and Bargain, Sell, Remise, Alien, Release, Convey, and Con--

Firm unto the said aforesaid Party second part, And heirs and assigns Forever and ever ALL

That certain lot or parcel of LAND situate in city of Dunkirk, County of Chautauqua, And likewise furthermore in York State

Bounded and described, to-wit, As follows, herein, namely BEGINNING distance of hundred two-and-forty feet,

North-half-east, north-east-by north, East-north-east and northerly northerly line of Mulligan street westerly line of Brannigan street,

And running thence due northerly On Brannigan street 200 feet, Thence at right angles westerly, North-west-by-west-and-west-half-west,

West-and-by-north, north-west-by-west, About--

I kind of dodged, boot-jack broke the looking-glass waited what became other missiles if I had wanted to, but no interest things