Wieland's Maddness by Charles Brockden Brown
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man of SORROWS !

he reflected not that credit should_be as reasonably denied to_the last as_to any former intimation; that one might as justly be ascribed to erring or diseased senses as_the other . he_saw not that_this discovery in no degree affected the integrity of_his conduct; that his motives had lost none of_their claims to_the homage of mankind; that_the preference of supreme good, and_the boundless energy of duty, were undiminished in_his bosom .

it_is_not for_me to pursue him through_the ghastly changes of_his countenance .Words he had none . now he sat upon_the floor, motionless in all his limbs, with_his eyes glazed and fixed, a monument of woe .

anon a spirit of tempestuous but undesigning activity seized him . he rose from_his place and strode across the floor, tottering and at random . his eyes were without moisture, and gleamed with_the fire that consumed his vitals . the muscles of_his face were agitated by convulsions . his lips moved, but no sound escaped him .

that nature should long sustain this conflict was not to_be believed . my state was little different from_that of_my brother .I entered, as it were, into his thoughts . my heart was visited and rent by his pangs ."Oh that thy frenzy had never been cured ! that thy madness, with its blissful visions, would return ! or, if that_must not be, that thy scene would hasten to a close ! -- that death would cover thee with_his oblivion !

" what can i_wish for thee ? thou who hast vied with_the great preacher of thy faith in sanctity of motives, and in elevation above sensual and selfish ! thou whom thy fate has changed into parricide and savage ! can i_wish for_the continuance of thy being ? no ."

for a time his movements seemed destitute of purpose . if he walked; if he turned; if his fingers were entwined with each_other; if his hands were pressed against opposite sides of_his head with a force sufficient to crush it into pieces; it_was to tear his mind from self- contemplation; to waste his thoughts on external objects .

speedily this train was broken .a beam appeared to_be darted into his mind which gave a purpose to_his efforts . an avenue to escape presented itself; and now he eagerly gazed about him . when my thoughts became engaged by his demeanor, my fingers were stretched as by a mechanical force, and_the knife, no longer heeded or of use, escaped from my grasp and fell unperceived on_the floor . his eye now lighted upon it; he seized it with_the quickness of thought .

I shrieked aloud, but it_was too late . he plunged it to_the hilt in_his neck; and_his life instantly escaped with_the stream that gushed from_the wound . he_was stretched at my feet; and my hands were sprinkled with_his blood as he fell .

such was thy last deed, my brother ! for a spectacle like this_was it my fate to_be reserved ! thy eyes were closed-- thy face ghastly with death-- thy arms, and_the spot where thou lyedst, floated in thy life's blood ! these images have_not for a moment forsaken me . till I_am breathless and cold, they_must continue to hover in my sight .

Carwin, as I_said, had left the room; but he still lingered in_the house . my voice summoned him to my aid; but I scarcely noticed his reentrance, and now faintly recollect his terrified looks, his broken exclamations, his vehement avowals of innocence, the effusions of_his pity for_me, and_his offers of assistance .

I_did_not listen--I answered him not--I ceased to upbraid or accuse . his guilt was a point to_which i_was indifferent . ruffian or devil, black as hell or bright as angels, thenceforth he_was nothing to_me . i_was incapable of sparing a look or a thought from_the ruin that was spread at my feet .

when he left me, i_was scarcely conscious of any variation in_the scene . he informed the inhabitants of_the hut of what had passed, and_they flew to_the spot . careless of_his own safety, he hasted to_the city to inform my friends of_my condition .

my uncle speedily arrived at_the house . the body of Wieland was removed from my presence, and_they supposed that i_would follow it; but no, my home is ascertained; here I_have taken up my rest, and never will I go hence, till, like Wieland, I_am borne to my grave .

importunity was tried in vain . they threatened to remove me by violence,--nay, violence was used; but my soul prizes too dearly this little roof to endure to_be bereaved of it . force should_not prevail when_the hoary locks and supplicating tears of_my uncle were ineffectual . my repugnance to move gave birth to ferociousness and frenzy when force was employed, and_they were obliged to consent to my return .

they besought me-- they remonstrated-- they appealed to every duty that connected me with_him that made me and with my fellow- men-- in vain . while I live i_will_not go hence . have I not fulfilled my destiny ?

why will ye torment me with your reasonings and reproofs ? can ye restore to_me the hope of_my better days ? can ye give_me back Catharine and her babes ? can ye recall to life him who died at my feet ?

i_will eat-- i_will drink-- i_will lie down and rise up-- at your bidding; all I ask is_the choice of_my abode . what is_there unreasonable in_this demand ? shortly will I be at peace . this_is_the spot which I_have chosen in_which to breathe my last sigh . deny me not, I beseech you, so slight a boon .

talk not to_me, O my reverend friend ! of Carwin . he has told thee his tale, and thou exculpatest him from all direct concern in_the fate of Wieland . this scene of havoc was produced by an illusion of_the senses . be it so; I care not from what source these disasters have flowed; it suffices that they_have swallowed up our hopes and_our existence .

what his agency began, his agency conducted to a close . he intended, by_the final effort of_his power, to rescue me and to banish his illusions from my brother . such is his tale, concerning the truth of_which I care not . henceforth I foster but one wish: I ask only quick deliverance from life and all the ills that attend it .

go, wretch ! torment me not with thy presence and thy prayers .-- forgive thee ? will that avail thee when thy fateful hour shall arrive ? be thou acquitted at thy own tribunal, and thou needest not fear the verdict of others . if thy guilt be capable of blacker hues, if hitherto thy conscience be without stain, thy crime will_be made more flagrant by thus violating my retreat . take thyself away from my sight if thou wouldst not behold my death !

thou art gone ! murmuring and reluctant ! and now my repose is coming-- my work is done !

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