Titbottom's Spectacles by George William Curtis
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spoke again, it_was with_the old, subdued tone, and_the air of quaint solemnity .

" these things were matters of long, long_ago, and I_came to_this country soon after .I brought with me, premature age, a past of melancholy memories, and_the magic spectacles .I had become their slave .I had nothing more to fear .Having seen myself, i_was compelled to_see others, properly to understand my relations to_them . the lights that cheer the future of other men had gone out for_me . my eyes were those of an exile turned backwards upon_the receding shore, and not forwards with hope upon_the ocean .I mingled with men, but with little pleasure . there_are but many varieties of a few types . I_did_not find those I_came to clearer sighted than those I had left behind .I heard men called shrewd and wise, and report said they were highly intelligent and successful . but when I looked at them through my glasses, I_found no halo of real manliness . my finest sense detected no aroma of purity and principle; but I_saw only a fungus that had fattened and spread in a night . they all went to_the theater to_see actors upon_the stage .I went to_see actors in_the boxes, so consummately cunning, that_the others did_not know they were acting, and they_did_not suspect it themselves .

" perhaps you wonder it did_not make me misanthropical . my dear friends, do_not forget that I had seen myself . it made me compassionate, not cynical . of_course I_could_not value highly the ordinary standards of success and excellence . when I went to church and saw a thin, blue, artificial flower, or a great sleepy cushion expounding the beauty of holiness to pews full of eagles, half-eagles, and threepences, however adroitly concealed in broadcloth and boots: or saw an onion in an Easter bonnet weeping over the sins of Magdalen, I_did_not feel as_they felt who saw in all this, not_only propriety, but piety . or when at public meetings an eel stood up on end, and wriggled and squirmed lithely in every direction, and declared that, for_his part, he went in for rainbows and hot water-- how could I help seeing that he_was still black and loved a slimy pool ?

" I_could_not grow misanthropical when I_saw in_the eyes of so_many who were called old, the gushing fountains of eternal youth, and_the light of an immortal dawn, or when I_saw those who were esteemed unsuccessful and aimless, ruling a fair realm of peace and plenty, either in themselves, or more perfectly in another--a realm and princely possession for_which they had well renounced a hopeless search and a belated triumph . I_knew one man who had_been for years a by- word for having sought the philosopher's stone . but I looked at him through_the spectacles and saw a satisfaction in concentrated energies, and a tenacity arising from devotion to a noble dream, which_was not apparent in_the youths who pitied him in_the aimless effeminacy of clubs, nor in_the clever gentlemen who cracked their thin jokes upon him over agossiping dinner .

" and there_was your neighbor over the way, who passes for a woman who has failed in her career, because she_is an old maid . people wag solemn heads of pity, and say that she made so great a mistake in not marrying the brilliant and famous man who was for long years her suitor . it_is clear that no orange flower will ever bloom for her . the young people make tender romances about her as_they watch her, and think of her solitary hours of bitter regret, and wasting longing, never to_be satisfied . when I first came to town I shared this sympathy, and pleased my imagination with fancying her hard struggle with_the conviction that she had lost all that made life beautiful .I supposed that if I looked at her through my spectacles, I should_see that_it_was only her radiant temper which so illuminated her dress, that we_did_not see it to_be heavy sables . but when, one day, I_did raise my glasses and glanced at her, I_did_not see the old maid whom we all pitied for a secret sorrow, but a woman whose nature was a tropic, in_which_the sun shone, and birds sang, and flowers bloomed forever . there were no regrets, no doubts and half wishes, but a calm sweetness, a transparent peace . I_saw her blush when_that old lover passed by, or paused to_speak to her, but it_was only the sign of delicate feminine consciousness . she knew his love, and honored it, although she_could_not understand it nor return it .I looked closely at her, and I_saw that although all the world had exclaimed at her indifference to such homage, and had declared it_was astonishing she should lose so fine a match, she_would only say simply and quietly--

"' if Shakespeare loved me and I_did_not love him, how could I marry him ? '

" could I be misanthropical when I_saw such fidelity, and dignity, and simplicity ?

" you_may believe that i_was especially curious to look at_that old lover of hers, through my glasses . he_was no longer young, you_know, when I_came, and_his fame and fortune were secure . certainly I_have heard of few men more beloved, and of none more worthy to_be loved . he had the easy manner of a man of_the world, the sensitive grace of a poet, and_the charitable judgment of a wide traveller . he_was accounted the most successful and most unspoiled of men . handsome, brilliant, wise, tender, graceful, accomplished, rich, and famous, I looked at him, without the spectacles, in surprise, and admiration, and wondered how your neighbor over the way had_been so entirely untouched by his homage .I watched their intercourse in society, I_saw her gay smile, her cordial greeting; I marked his frank address, his lofty courtesy . their manner told no tales . the eager world was balked, and I pulled out my spectacles .

"I had seen her, already, and now I_saw him . he lived only in memory, and_his memory was a spacious and stately palace . but he_did_not oftenest frequent the banqueting hall, where were endless hospitality and feasting-- nor did he loiter much in reception rooms, where a throng of new visitors was forever swarming-- nor did he feed his vanity by haunting the apartment in_which were stored the trophies of_his varied triumphs-- nor dream much in_the great gallery hung with pictures of_his travels . but from all these lofty halls of memory he constantly escaped to a remote and solitary chamber, into which no one had ever penetrated . but my fatal eyes, behind the glasses, followed and entered with_him, and saw that_the chamber was a chapel . it_was dim, and silent, and sweet with perpetual incense that burned upon an altar before a picture forever veiled . there, whenever I chanced to look, I_saw him kneel and pray; and there, by day and by night, a funeral hymn was chanted .

" I_do_not believe you_will_be surprised that I_have_been content to remain deputy bookkeeper . my spectacles regulated my ambition, and I early learned that there were better gods than Plutus . the glasses have lost much of_their fascination now, and I_do_not often use them .Sometimes the desire is irresistible . whenever I_am greatly interested, I_am compelled to_take them out and_see what it is_that I admire .

" and yet-- and yet," said Titbottom, after a pause, " I_am not sure that I thank my grandfather ."

Prue had long since laid away her work, and had heard every word of_the story . I_saw that_the dear woman had yet one question to ask, and had_been earnestly hoping to hear something that_would spare her the necessity of asking . but Titbottom had resumed his usual tone, after_the momentary excitement, and made no further allusion to himself . we all sat silently; Titbottom's eyes fastened musingly upon_the carpet: Prue looking wistfully at him, and I regarding both .

it_was past midnight, and_our guest arose to_go . he shook hands quietly, made his grave Spanish bow to Prue, and taking his hat, went towards the front door .Prue and I accompanied him . I_saw in her eyes that she_would ask her question . and as Titbottom opened the door, I heard the low words:

" and Preciosa ? "

Titbottom paused . he had just opened the door and_the moonlight streamed over him as he stood, turning back to_us .

" I_have_seen her but once since . it_was in church, and she was kneeling with her eyes closed, so_that she did_not see me . but I rubbed the glasses well, and looked at her, and saw a white lily, whose stem was broken, but which_was fresh; and luminous, and fragrant, still ."

" that was a miracle," interrupted Prue .

" madam, it_was a miracle," replied Titbottom, " and for_that one sight I_am devoutly grateful for_my grandfather's gift . I_saw, that although a flower may_have lost its hold upon earthly moisture, it may still bloom as sweetly, fed by_the dews of heaven ."

the door closed, and he_was gone . but as Prue put her arm in mine and we went upstairs together, she whispered in my ear:

" how glad I_am that you don't wear spectacles ."

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