Oz 08: Tik-Tok of Oz by L. Frank Baum

Oz 08: Tik-Tok of Oz by L. Frank Baum
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Ozma

"Ozma's army doesn't fight ," returned Files; " but your army must fight like fury in_order conquer the world I_have read books that_it_is always the private soldiers who do_the fighting, for officer ever brave enough to_face the foe also , stands reason that your officers must_have some one command and issue their orders ; therefore I'll the one I long slash and slay the enemy and become hero then , when return Oogaboo, I'll take all the marbles away from_the children and melt them and make marble statue myself for all look upon and admire "

Ann was much pleased with private Files he_seemed indeed to_be such warrior she needed her enterprise , and her hopes success took sudden bound when Files told her he_knew where gun - tree grew and would there once and pick the ripest and biggest musket the tree bore

chapter two

out Oogaboo

three days later the grand army Oogaboo assembled in_the square front of_the royal palace the sixteen officers were attired gorgeous uniforms and carried sharp , glittering swords the private had picked his gun and , although it_was not very big weapon , Files tried look fierce and succeeded so_well that all his commanding officers were secretly afraid him

the women were there , protesting that queen Ann Soforth had right to_take their husbands and fathers from_them ; but Ann commanded them to_keep silent , and_that was_the hardest order obey they had ever received

the queen appeared before her army dressed imposing uniform green , covered with gold braid she wore green soldier -cap with purple plume in_it and looked royal and dignified that everyone Oogaboo except the army was glad she was going the army was sorry she was not going alone

" form ranks ! " she cried her shrill voice

Salye leaned out_of_the palace window and laughed

"I believe your army can run better than can fight ," she observed

" of_course ," replied general Bunn, proudly " 're not looking for trouble , you_know , but for plunder the more plunder and_the less fighting get , the better we_shall like our work "

" for_my part ," said Files, "I prefer war and carnage anything the only way to_become hero conquer , and_the story -books all say that_the easiest way conquer fight "

" that 's the idea , brave man ! " agreed Ann " fight conquer and conquer secure plunder and secure plunder to_become hero with_such noble determination back , the world mine ! good -bye, Salye when return we_shall_be rich and famous come , Generals; let_us march "

at_this the Generals straightened and threw out their chests then they swung their glittering swords rapid circles and cried to_the Colonels:

" for - ward march ! "

then the Colonels shouted to_the Majors: " for - ward march ! " and_the Majors yelled to_the Captains: " for - ward march ! " and_the Captains screamed to_the private :

" for - ward march ! "

Files shouldered his gun and began march , and all the officers followed after him queen Ann came last all , rejoicing her noble army and wondering why she had_not decided long_ago conquer the world

in_this order the procession marched out Oogaboo and took the narrow mountain pass which led into_the lovely fairyland Oz

chapter three

magic Mystifies the Marchers

princess Ozma was all unaware that_the army Oogaboo, led their ambitious queen , was determined conquer her kingdom the beautiful girl ruler Oz was busy with_the welfare her subjects and had time to_think Ann Soforth and her disloyal plans but there_was one who constantly guarded the peace and happiness of_the land Oz and this_was the official sorceress of_the kingdom , Glinda the good

her magnificent castle , which stands far north of_the emerald city where Ozma holds her court , Glinda owns wonderful magic record book , in_which printed every event that takes place anywhere , just as_soon_as happens

the smallest things and_the biggest things are all recorded in_this book child stamps its foot anger , Glinda reads about_it ; city Burns down , Glinda finds the fact noted her book

the sorceress always reads her record book every day , and it_was she knew that Ann Soforth, queen Oogaboo, had foolishly assembled army sixteen officers and one private soldier , with_which she intended invade and conquer the land Oz

there_was danger but that Ozma, supported by_the magic arts Glinda the good and_the powerful wizard Oz-- both her firm friends -- could easily defeat far more imposing army than Ann's; but would_be shame to_have the peace Oz interrupted any sort quarreling fighting Glinda did_not even mention the matter Ozma, anyone else she merely went into great chamber her castle , known as_the magic room , where she performed magical ceremony which caused the mountain pass that led from Oogaboo to_make several turns and twists the result was_that when Ann and her army came to_the end of_the pass they were_not in_the land Oz all , but adjoining territory that was quite distinct from Ozma's domain and separated from Oz invisible barrier

as_the Oogaboo people emerged into_this country , the pass they had traversed disappeared behind them and it_was not likely they_would ever find their way back into_the valley Oogaboo they were greatly puzzled , indeed , their surroundings and did_not know which_way to_go none_of_them had ever visited Oz, took them some_time discover they were_not Oz all , but unknown country

" never mind ," said Ann, trying conceal her disappointment ; " we_have started out conquer the world , and here_is part in_time , as_we pursue our victorious journey , we_will doubtless come Oz; but , until get there , we_may as_well conquer whatever land we_find ourselves "

" have conquered this place , your majesty ? " anxiously inquired major cake

" most certainly ," said Ann " we_have met people , as_yet , but when we_do , we_will inform them that_they_are our slaves "

" and afterward we_will plunder them all their possessions," added general apple

" they_may not possess anything ," objected private Files; " but I_hope they_will fight , just the same peaceful conquest wouldn't any fun all "

"Don't worry ," said the queen " we_can fight , whether our foes not ; and perhaps we_would find more comfortable to_have the enemy surrender promptly "

it_was barren country and not very pleasant travel moreover , there_was little for_them eat , and as_the officers became hungry they became fretful many would_have deserted had they been able to_find their way home , but as_the Oogaboo people were now hopelessly lost strange country they considered more safe to_keep together than separate

queen Ann's temper , never very agreeable , became sharp and irritable she and her army tramped over the rocky roads without encountering either people plunder she scolded her officers until they became surly , and few of_them were disloyal enough ask her hold her tongue Others began reproach her for leading them into difficulties and in_the space three unhappy days every man was mourning for_his orchard in_the pretty valley Oogaboo

Files, however , proved different sort the more difficulties encountered the more cheerful became , and_the sighs of_the officers were answered by_the merry whistle of_the private his pleasant disposition did much encourage queen Ann and before long she consulted the private soldier more often than she did his superiors

it_was on_the third day of_their pilgrimage that_they encountered their first adventure toward evening the sky was suddenly darkened and major Nails exclaimed :

"A fog coming toward "

" I_do_not_think it_is fog ," replied Files, looking with interest at_the approaching cloud " seems to_me more like the breath Rak "

" what_is Rak ? " asked Ann, looking about fearfully

"A terrible beast with horrible appetite ," answered the soldier , growing little paler than usual " I_have never seen Rak, to_be_sure , but I_have read of_them in_the story -books that grew orchard , and if_this_is indeed one of_those fearful monsters, we_are_not likely conquer the world "

Hearing this , the officers became quite worried and gathered closer about their soldier

" what_is the thing like ? " asked one

" the only Rak that I ever saw book was rather blurred ," said Files, " because the book was not quite ripe when it_was picked but the creature can fly in_the air and run like deer and swim like fish inside its body glowing furnace fire , and_the Rak breathes air and breathes out smoke , which darkens the sky for miles around , wherever goes it_is bigger than hundred men and feeds any living thing "

the officers now began groan and tremble , but Files tried cheer them , saying:

" may not Rak, after all , that see approaching , and you_must not forget that people Oogaboo, which_is part of_the fairyland Oz, cannot_be killed "

" nevertheless ," said captain Buttons, " if_the Rak catches , and chews into small pieces, and swallows -- what_will happen then ? "

" then each small piece will still alive ," declared Files

"I cannot_see how that_would help_us ," wailed colonel banjo "A hamburger steak hamburger steak , whether it_is alive not ! "

"I tell you , this_may not Rak," persisted Files " we_will know , when_the cloud gets nearer , whether it_is_the breath Rak not if_it has smell all , it_is probably fog ; but if_it has odor salt and pepper , it_is Rak and we_must prepare for desperate fight "

they all eyed the dark cloud fearfully before long reached the frightened group and began envelop them every nose sniffed the cloud -- and every_one detected in_it the odor salt and pepper

" the Rak ! " shouted private Files, and with howl despair the sixteen officers fell to_the ground , writhing and moaning anguish queen Ann sat down upon rock and faced the cloud more bravely , although her heart was beating fast for Files, calmly loaded his gun and stood ready fight the foe , soldier should

they were now absolute darkness , for_the cloud which covered the sky and_the setting sun was black ink then through_the gloom appeared two round , glowing balls red , and Files once decided these must_be the monster 's eyes

raised his gun , took aim and fired

there were several bullets in_the gun , all gathered from excellent - tree Oogaboo, and_they were big and hard they flew toward the monster and struck , and with wild , weird cry the Rak came fluttering down and its huge body fell plump upon_the forms of_the sixteen officers, who thereupon screamed louder than before

" badness ! " moaned the Rak " see what you 've done with_that dangerous gun yours ! "

" I_can 't see ," replied Files, " for_the cloud formed your breath darkens sight ! "

"Don't tell it_was accident ," continued the Rak, reproachfully , still flapped its wings helpless manner "Don't claim you didn't know the gun was loaded , I beg you ! "

"I don't intend ," replied Files " did the bullets hurt you very badly ? "

" one has broken jaw , so_that I_can 't open mouth you_will notice that voice sounds rather harsh and husky , because I_have to_talk with teeth set together another broke left wing , so_that I_can 't fly ; and still another broke right leg , so_that I_can 't walk was_the most careless shot I ever heard ! "

" can 't you manage lift your body off from commanding officers ? " inquired Files " from their cries I'm afraid your great weight crushing them "

" I_hope it_is ," growled the Rak " i_want crush them , possible , for I_have bad disposition only I_could open mouth , I'd eat all you , although appetite poorly this warm weather "

with_this the Rak began roll its immense body sidewise , as_to crush the officers more easily ; but doing this rolled completely off from_them and_the entire sixteen scrambled to_their feet and made off fast they_could run

private Files could_not_see them but he_knew from_the sound of_their voices that_they had escaped, ceased worry about_them

" pardon I now bid you good -bye," he_said to_the Rak " the parting caused our desire to_continue our journey if_you die , do_not blame , for i_was obliged shoot you matter self - protection "