The Man who Could Work Miracles by H.G. Wells
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the man who_could work Miracles

by H .G .Wells

aPANTOUM in prose .

it_is doubtful whether the gift was innate . for_my own part, i_think it came to him suddenly . indeed, until he_was thirty he_was asceptic, and did_not believe in miraculous powers . and here, since it_is_the most convenient place, I_must mention that he_was a little man, and had eyes of a hot brown, very erect red hair, amoustache with ends that he twisted up, and freckles . his name was George McWhirter Fotheringay-- not the sort of name by any means to lead to any expectation of miracles-- and he_was clerk at Gomshott's . he_was greatly addicted to assertive argument . it_was while he_was asserting the impossibility of miracles that he had his first intimation of_his extraordinary powers . this particular argument was being held in_the bar of_the long dragon, and toddy Beamish was conducting the opposition by a monotonous but effective " so you say," that drove Mr Fotheringay to_the very limit of_his patience .

there were present, besides these two, a very dusty cyclist, landlord Cox, and miss Maybridge, the perfectly respectable and rather portly barmaid of_the dragon . miss Maybridge was standing with her back to Mr Fotheringay, washing glasses; the others were watching him, more or less amused by_the present ineffectiveness of_the assertive method .Goaded by_the Torres Vedras tactics of Mr Beamish, Mr Fotheringay determined to_make an unusual rhetorical effort ."Looky here, Mr Beamish," said Mr Fotheringay ." let_us clearly understand what a miracle is . it's something contrariwise to_the course of nature, done by power of will, something what couldn't happen without being specially willed ."

" so you say," said Mr Beamish, repulsing him .

Mr Fotheringay appealed to_the cyclist, who had hitherto been a silent auditor, and received his assent-- given with ahesitating cough and a glance at Mr Beamish . the landlord would express no opinion, and Mr Fotheringay, returning to Mr Beamish, received the unexpected concession of a qualified assent to_his definition of a miracle .

" for instance," said Mr Fotheringay, greatly encouraged ." here would_be a miracle . that lamp, in_the natural course of nature, couldn't burn like that upsy- down, could it, Beamish ? "

"_You say it couldn't," said Beamish .

" and you ? " said Fotheringay ." you don't mean to_say--eh ? "

" no," said Beamish reluctantly ." no, it couldn't ."

" very_well," said Mr Fotheringay ." then here comes someone, as it might_be me, along here, and stands as it might_be here, and says to_that lamp, as I_might do, collecting all my will-- turn upsy- down without breaking, and go on burning steady, and--Hullo ! "

it_was enough to_make anyone say "Hullo ! " the impossible, the incredible, was visible to_them all . the lamp hung inverted in_the air, burning quietly with its flame pointing down . it_was as solid, as indisputable as ever a lamp was, the prosaic common lamp of_the long dragon bar .

Mr Fotheringay stood with an extended forefinger and_the knitted brows of one anticipating a catastrophic smash . the cyclist, who was sitting next the lamp, ducked and jumped across the bar . everybody jumped, more or less . miss Maybridge turned and screamed . for nearly three seconds the lamp remained still .a faint cry of mental distress came from Mr Fotheringay ." I_can't keep it up," he_said, " any longer ." he staggered back, and_the inverted lamp suddenly flared, fell against the corner of_the bar, bounced aside, smashed upon_the floor, and went out .

it_was lucky it had a metal receiver, or the whole place would_have_been in a blaze .Mr Cox was_the first to_speak, and_his remark, shorn of needless excrescences, was to_the effect that Fotheringay was a fool .Fotheringay was beyond disputing even so fundamental a proposition as_that ! he_was astonished beyond measure at_the thing that had occurred . the subsequent conversation threw absolutely no light on_the matter so_far as Fotheringay was concerned; the general opinion not_only followed Mr Cox very closely but very vehemently . everyone accused Fotheringay of a silly trick, and presented him to himself as a foolish destroyer of comfort and security . his mind was in a tornado of perplexity, he_was himself inclined to agree with_them, and he_made aremarkably ineffectual opposition to_the proposal of_his departure .

he went home flushed and heated, coat- collar crumpled, eyes smarting, and ears red . he watched each of_the ten street lamps nervously as he passed it . it_was only when he_found himself alone in_his little bedroom in church row that he_was able to grapple seriously with_his memories of_the occurrence, and ask, " what on earth happened ? "

he had removed his coat and boots, and was sitting on_the bed with_his hands in_his pockets repeating the text of_his defence for_the seventeenth time, "I didn't want the confounded thing to upset," when it occurred to him that at_the precise moment he had said the commanding words he had inadvertently willed the thing he_said, and_that when he had seen the lamp in_the air he had felt that_it depended on him to maintain it there without being clear how this_was to_be_done . he had_not a particularly complex mind, or he_might_have stuck for a time at_that "inadvertently willed," embracing, as it does, the abstrusest problems of voluntary action; but as it_was, the idea came to him with a quite acceptable haziness . and from_that, following, as I_must admit, no clear logical path, he_came to_the test of experiment .

he pointed resolutely to_his candle and collected his mind, though he_felt he_did a foolish thing ." be raised up," he_said . but in a second that feeling vanished . the candle was raised, hung in_the air one giddy moment, and as Mr Fotheringay gasped, fell with a smash on_his toilet- table, leaving him in darkness save for_the expiring glow of_its wick .

for a time Mr Fotheringay sat in_the darkness, perfectly still ." it did happen, after all," he_said ." and 'ow I'm to explain it I _don't know ." he sighed heavily, and began feeling in_his pockets for a match . he_could find none, and he rose and groped about_the toilet- table ." i_wish I had a match," he_said . he resorted to_his coat, and there_was none there, and then it dawned upon him that miracles were possible even with matches . he extended a hand and scowled at it in_the dark ." let there be a match in_that hand," he_said . he_felt some light object fall across his palm and_his fingers closed upon a match .

after several ineffectual attempts to light this, he discovered it_was a safety match . he threw it down, and then it occurred to him that he_might_have willed it lit . he_did, and perceived it burning in_the midst of_his toilet- table mat . he caught it up hastily, and it went out . his perception of possibilities enlarged, and he_felt for and replaced the candle in its candlestick ." here ! you be lit," said Mr Fotheringay, and forthwith the candle was flaring, and he_saw a little black hole in_the toilet- cover, with a wisp of smoke rising from_it . for a time he stared from_this to_the little flame and back, and then looked up and met his own gaze in_the looking- glass . by_this help he communed with himself in silence for a time .

" how about miracles now ? " said Mr Fotheringay at last, addressing his reflection .

the subsequent meditations of Mr Fotheringay were of a severe but confused description . so_far, he could_see it_was a case of pure willing with_him . the nature of_his experiences so_far disinclined him for any further experiments, at_least until he had reconsidered them . but he lifted a sheet of paper, and turned a glass of water pink and then green, and he created a snail, which he miraculously annihilated, and got himself a miraculous new tooth- brush . somewhere in_the small hours he had reached the fact that his will- power must_be of a particularly rare and pungent quality, a fact of_which he had indeed had inklings before, but no certain assurance . the scare and perplexity of_his first discovery was now qualified by pride in_this evidence of singularity and by vague intimations of advantage . he became aware that_the church clock was striking one, and as it did_not occur to him that his daily duties at Gomshott's might_be miraculously dispensed with, he resumed undressing, in_order to_get to bed without further delay . as he struggled to_get his shirt over his head, he_was struck with a brilliant idea ." let me be in bed," he_said, and found himself so ." undressed," he stipulated; and, finding the sheets cold, added hastily, " and in my nightshirt--ho, in a nice soft woollen nightshirt .Ah ! " he_said with immense enjoyment ." and now let me be comfortably asleep .. ."

he awoke at his usual hour and was pensive all through breakfast- time, wondering whether his over- night experience might_not_be a particularly vivid dream . at_length his mind turned again to cautious experiments . for instance, he had three eggs for breakfast; two his landlady had supplied, good, but shoppy, and one was a delicious fresh goose-egg, laid, cooked, and served by his extraordinary will . he hurried off to Gomshott's in a state of profound but carefully concealed excitement, and only remembered the shell of_the third egg when his landlady spoke of it that night . all day he_could do no work because of_this astonishing new self- knowledge, but this caused him no inconvenience, because he_made up for_it miraculously in_his last ten minutes .

as_the day wore on_his state of mind passed from wonder to elation, albeit the circumstances of_his dismissal from_the long dragon were still disagreeable to recall, and agarbled account of_the matter that had reached his colleagues led to some badinage . it_was evident he_must_be careful how he lifted frangible articles, but in other ways his gift promised more and more as he turned it over in_his mind . he intended among other things to increase his personal property by unostentatious acts of creation . he_called into existence a pair of very splendid diamond studs, and hastily annihilated them again as young Gomshott came across the counting- house to_his desk . he_was afraid young Gomshott might wonder how he had come by_them . he_saw quite clearly the gift required caution and watchfulness in its exercise, but so_far as he_could judge the difficulties attending its mastery would_be no greater than those he had already faced in_the study of cycling . it was_that analogy, perhaps, quite as_much as_the feeling that he_would_be unwelcome in_the long dragon, that drove him out after supper into_the lane beyond the gasworks, to rehearse a few miracles in private .

there_was possibly a certain want of originality in_his attempts, for, apart from_his will- power, Mr Fotheringay was not a very exceptional man . the miracle of Moses' rod came to_his mind, but the night was dark and unfavourable to_the proper control of large miraculous snakes . then he recollected the story of "Tannhuser" that he had read on_the back of_the philharmonic programme . that seemed to him singularly attractive and harmless . he stuck his walking- stick--a very nice Poona-Penang lawyer-- into_the turf that edged the footpath, and commanded the dry wood to blossom . the air was immediately full of_the scent of roses, and by_means of a match he_saw for himself that_this beautiful miracle was indeed accomplished . his satisfaction was ended by advancing footsteps . afraid of a premature discovery of_his powers, he addressed the blossoming stick hastily: " go back ." what he meant was " change back;" but of_course he_was confused . the stick receded at a considerable velocity, and incontinently came a cry of anger and a bad word from_the approaching person ." who_are you throwing brambles at, you fool ? " cried a voice ." that got me on_the shin ."

"I'm sorry, old chap," said Mr Fotheringay, and then, realising the awkward nature of_the explanation, caught nervously at his moustache . he_saw Winch, one_of_the three Immering constables, advancing .

" what d'yer mean by_it ? " asked the constable ."Hullo ! it's you, is_it ? the gent that broke the lamp at_the long dragon ! "

"I don't mean anything by_it," said Mr Fotheringay ." nothing at all ."

" what d'yer do_it for then ? "

"Oh, bother ! " said Mr Fotheringay .

" bother indeed ! D'yer know that stick hurt ? what d'yer do_it for, eh ? "

for_the moment Mr Fotheringay could_not think what he had done it for . his silence seemed to irritate Mr Winch ." you've been assaulting the police, young man, this_time . that's what you done ."

" look here, Mr Winch," said Mr Fotheringay, annoyed and confused, "I'm sorry, very . the fact is----"

" well ? "

he_could think of no way but the truth ." i_was working a miracle ." he tried to_speak in an off- hand way, but try as he_would he couldn't .

"Working a-- ! 'Ere, don't you talk rot .Working a miracle, indeed ! miracle ! well, that's downright funny ! why, you's the chap that don't believe in miracles .. . fact is, this_is another of your silly conjuring tricks-- that's what this_is . now, I tell you--"

but Mr Fotheringay never heard what Mr Winch was going to_tell him . he realised he had given himself away, flung his valuable secret to all the winds of heaven .a violent gust of irritation swept him to action . he turned on_the constable swiftly and fiercely ." here," he_said, "I've had enough of_this, I_have ! I'll show you a silly conjuring trick, i_will ! go to Hades ! go, now ! "

he_was alone !

Mr Fotheringay performed no more miracles that night, nor did he trouble to_see what had become of_his flowering stick . he returned to_the town, scared and very quiet, and went to_his bedroom ." lord ! " he_said, " it's a powerful gift-- an extremely powerful gift .I didn't hardly mean as_much as_that . not

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