Oz 18: Grandpa in Oz by Ruth Plumly Thompson
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too dazed to_think himself and could only mutter over and over, "A monster ! a monster ! my daughter ! a monster ! "

" the fellow's a fool ! " choked Percy Vere ." he's as full of ideas as a dish pan . why he's a monster himself ! "

" but there's something in what he_says," groaned the old peer unhappily ." if_my daughter were already married when_this monster came, he_could_not carry her off . I_have it ! Percy, we'll marry the princess at once, to_the likeliest lad in perhaps city ."

" to_me ! " cried the forgetful poet, tossing back his long locks and sticking out his chest complacently .

" well--er," the old monarch looked a trifle embarrassed, " you're hardly the man to marry and settle down to a humdrum royal existence . i_was thinking of young Perix ."

" you're right," agreed Percy, mollified at once ." marriage would interfere with my career, O peer . shall I fetch our pretty little princess ? "

" yes, call her at once," begged peer Haps, clasping and unclasping his hands, " but don't frighten her, Percy my boy, no talk of marriage or monsters ! "

Percy felt that the_only_thing he_could do, under the circumstances, was to lapse into verse .

"I go, I go, on heel and toe to fetch the sweetest girl I_know, the princess of perhaps city, as sweet as sugar full of tea ! "

caroled the forgetful poet, bounding through_the door into_the garden . peer Haps smiled

faintly, then remembering the monster, frowned and began drumming nervously on_the arm of_his chair . he_did_not even look up when_the yellow hen hopped into_the room, and, with a self- conscious cluck, laid a gold brick on_the mantel .

" what's the matter ? " asked the hen sulkily .

" everything ! " groaned peer Haps, straining his eyes for_the first sign of Percy and_the princess ." everything ! " at_that instant Percy rushed back .

" the princess is lost, gone, mislaid ! " cried the forgetful poet, crossing his eyes in_his extreme agitation .

" you speak as_if she were an egg," clucked the yellow hen, but no one paid any attention to her and in a huff the spoiled creature flew out the window and dropped a gold brick on_the head of_the chief gardener . but no one, except the chief gardener, paid any attention to_this either, for peer Haps had raised such a clamor over the disappearance of_his daughter that_the whole castle was in an uproar . indeed in five minutes more every woman, man and child in perhaps city had joined in_the search for_the missing princess . after they had searched high and low, and everywhere else for_that matter, Percy suddenly bethought himself of_the prophet and, rushing up the fifty steps to_his tower, thumped hard upon_the door . there_was no answer .Percy flung the door open and there_was no prophet .Abrog was gone too !

in_the face of_this new calamity the dreadful prophecy about_the monster was almost forgotten . peer Haps sank down upon his throne and in_spite of_his sixty years and three hundred pounds wept like a baby .

" he's perfectly perfidious ! " exclaimed Percy Vere, who was entirely out of breath from_the steps . all the courtiers solemnly shook their heads

"A villain old and hideous, and perfectly perfidious, has run off with_our daughter . what shall be_done to him, O peer, this prophesighing profiteer deserves both death and- and-"

" slaughter," sobbed peer Haps convulsively . then mopping his face he sat up ." someone must follow him at once and bring her back ! " thundered the old monarch ."A thousand gold bricks to_the man who brings her back .a thousand gold bricks and_the princess' hand in marriage ! " at_this there_was a great shuffling of feet and_the young men of perhaps city began to exchange uneasy glances .

" down the mountain ? " asked Perix faintly .

" where else ? " demanded peer Haps, glaring angrily at_the young nobleman whom he had intended for_his daughter .

" but we_might_be dashed to pieces . it_is terribly unsafe," stuttered Perix unhappily . all the other Happsies began to shake their heads and murmur sadly, " unsafe, very unsafe ! "

" well, how about_my daughter ? " roared the poor monarch, puffing out his cheeks ." will no one go after my daughter ? " there_was more shuffling of feet, but not a voice was raised . we_must not be too hard on_these young Happsies, remembering that in all their lives and in_the lives of_their fathers and grandfathers no one had ever descended maybe mountain excepting Abrog the old prophet .

"I'll go myself ! " spluttered peer Haps explosively . but as he arose with a great groan, the forgetful poet rushed forward and embraced as_much of_the peer as his arms would circle .

" you'd be broken to bits ! " cried Percy distractedly ." suppose you stumbled .I, i_will go and find the princess and this meddling, miserable prophet ."

" you ! why you'll forget what you're after before_you start," sneered Perix disagreeably .

" as_to_that," said Percy, snapping his fingers under the young fellow's nose, " I_may forget a word now_and_then, but I don't forget how to act when my king is in trouble ! "

"Hurrah ! " shouted the gardener, throwing up his hat . he had recovered from_the shock of_the gold brick ."Hurrah for Percy Vere; he's the bravest of_the lot ! "

" but how will_you go ? " quavered peer Haps . he_was torn between relief at Percy's brave offer and sorrow at_the thought of losing his prime and favorite companion .

" here's how," cried the valiant poet .Rushing down the golden steps of_the palace, Percy leaped over the gate and plunged recklessly down the steep mountain side .Percy was well accustomed to hill-climbing and met with no mishap as he plunged downward .

chapter 9

Dorothy Meets a new celebrity

Dorothy had_been to_see the tin woodman and now, with Toto, her small shaggy dog, running at her side, was skipping merrily down one_of_the wide Winkie Lanes .

" i_think nick chopper looks very_well, don't you Toto ? " said Dorothy, tickling his ear with a long feathery weed .

" woof ! " barked Toto reproachfully .Toto like all other dogs in Oz could talk if he_wanted to, but Toto, being originally from Kansas, preferred his own language . just then, seeing a lively baconfly, Toto gave another bark and dashed across a daisy field . away fluttered the baconfly, and you_have no idea how fast these little rascals can flutter, and away, his ears flapping with excitement, pounded Toto, and away after Toto ran Dorothy, for she was always in fear of losing her reckless little pet . up and down, here and there, ' round and ' round, darted the mischievous baconfly, until Toto's tongue hung out and he simply panted with exhaustion . then with a spiteful sputter, the baconfly disappeared under a rhinestone, and after scratching and whining and even growling a little, Toto gave up the chase and trotted rather sheepishly back to Dorothy .

" that was really too bad of you Toto," panted the little girl reprovingly ." you wouldn't eat a poor little baconfly, would you ? "

" woof, gr-rr woof ! " sulked Toto, which_was Kansas for " you bet i_would ! " Pretending not to understand this last remark, Dorothy fanned herself with her broad straw hat and started slowly back toward the lane . but the baconfly had led them such a round- about chase that when she did come to_the lane she turned in exactly the opposite direction from_the way she had intended, and instead of walking toward the emerald city she began walking away from_it . but as neither she nor Toto was aware of_this fact, they progressed most cheerfully, Dorothy carrying on a one- sided conversation with_the saucy little bow-wow . occasionally Toto would bark or wag his tail, but most of_the time he listened in superior silence to_the little girl's chatter of_the fun they had had in nick chopper's tin castle .

now how nick chopper came to_have a castle is a story in itself, for nick has, in_the course of_his strange and interesting life, risen from a wood- chopper to emperor of all the Winkies and from an ordinary blood and bone man to a real celebrity of tin . yes, nick is entirely a man of tin, as_you_can see by referring to any of_the histories of Oz . in_these same histories it_is recorded how a wicked witch enchanted nick's ax, so_that first it cut off his legs, then his arms and finally his body and head . but you_cannot kill a good Ozman like nick chopper and after each accident he hied him to a tin- smith for repairs . first the tin- smith made him tin legs, then tin arms, next a tin body and at last a tin head, so_that he_was completely a man of tin . and this same little Dorothy, on her first trip to Oz, had discovered the tin woodman, rusting in a forest, had oiled up his joints and taken him to_the emerald city itself . there the wizard of Oz had given him a warm, red plush heart, which he still has and since then nick has_been in almost every important adventure that has happened in_the wonderful land of Oz .Ozma, the little fairy ruler of Oz, finding nick so dependable and so unusual, has_made him emperor of_the east, and_the loyal little Winkies have built him a splendid tin castle in_the center of_their pleasant yellow country .

Dorothy herself was first blown to Oz in a Kansas cyclone and after a great_many visits to_this delightful country, determined to stay for good . so Ozma, with_the help of her magic belt, transported Dorothy and uncle Henry and aunt Em and Toto to_the land of Oz . uncle Henry and aunt Em have a comfortable little farm just outside of_the emerald city, but Dorothy and Toto have a cunning apartment in_the emerald palace itself, for Ozma cannot bear to_have Dorothy far away . the two girls- for Ozma herself is only a little girl fairy- have_been through so_many adventures together that_they_are almost inseparable, and to show her love and affection for_this little girl from_the United_States Ozma has_made Dorothy a royal princess of Oz .

but through all her honors and adventures Dorothy has remained the same jolly little girl she was in Kansas . every now_and_then she puts aside her silk court frocks, slips into an old gingham dress and steals off for a visit to some of her friends in_the country .

" we'll soon be at_the Scarecrow's, Toto; shall you like that ? " she asked, after skipping along for five whole minutes without speaking ." perhaps he'll have corn muffins and honey and- whatever's that ? "

" little girl ! little girl ! " a voice came echoing high and clear down the sunlit lane .Toto pricked up his ears, and Dorothy, shading her eyes, turned in_the direction of_the voice .Running toward her was a young man clothed all in buff an extremely excited and agitated young man- and by_the_time he reached Dorothy and Toto he_was perfectly breathless .

" well-" began Dorothy, hardly knowing what else to_say .

" not very_well, thank_you," puffed the young man, slapping at his face with a yellow silk handkerchief . on closer inspection Dorothy saw that his handsome suit was torn and muddied and_the young man himself exceedingly scratched and weary .

" I_am most unhappy," he continued, regarding her mournfully ." at_least, when I_can remember to_be . it_is hard to_be unhappy in a lovely country like this ."

" then why do_you try to remember to_be ? " asked Dorothy with a little laugh, while Toto made a playful dash at_the stranger's heels .

"A great deal depends on my remembering," explained the young man eagerly ." if I forget to_be unhappy I_may forget why I fell down the mountain and why I_am wandering in , this strange country without friends or food ."

" well, why are_you ? " Dorothy could control her curiosity no longer .

" I_am seeking a princess," replied the youth solemnly .

"A princess ! well, will I_do ? " Dorothy smiled mischievously and while the stranger stared at her, round- eyed, she made him her prettiest court bow . the result was extremely funny . the forgetful poet- for of_course you_have guessed all along that_it_was he extended his arms toward Toto and cried accusingly:

"I looked the maiden in_the eye, I looked her up and down, she says she_is a princess, but, she hasn't any- any- ? "

Toto barked indignantly at_this limping poetry .

"I suppose you mean crown, giggled Dorothy ." yes I_have too, but it's at home, in Ozma's castle ."

" the crown is in_the castle, the castle's in_the town; the town is in_the land of Oz, but how about her- her-"

he stared helplessly at Dorothy's gingham dress and, with another little scream of laughter, Dorothy finished his verse ." gown ! " spluttered the little girl ." do_you always talk like that ? "

" pretty often," admitted Percy Vere apologetically ." you_see, I_am a poet . and I_know who you_are now . you're princess Dorothy herself ! " he smiled so charmingly as he_said this that Dorothy could_not help smiling back

"I've read all about you in peer Haps' history books," confided Percy triumphantly ." shall I address you as princess ? " as he asked this question the troubled expression returned to_his eyes ." you haven't seen a princess anywhere around here have_you ? " he added anxiously . Dorothy shook her head and Toto began sniffing under all the bushes as_if he expected to_find a princess in any_one_of_them .

"A little princess, Passing fair, with rosy cheeks and yellow- yellow-"

" hair," put in Dorothy quickly ." who_is she ? who_are you and how did she get lost ? let's sit down and then you_can tell me all about_it ." " he's exactly like a puzzle," thought Dorothy, with an amused little sniff . so Percy Vere sat down beside her under aspreading jelly tree and as quickly as he_could he_told of_the strange happenings in perhaps city, of_the prophecy about_the monster, of_the strange conduct of old Abrog,

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